You take the grey skies out of my way
You make the sun shine brighter than any day
Turned a bright spark into a flame
My beats per minute has never been the same
Then all of a sudden-
"What the hell are you doing everyday? Mechanical life!"
My room-mate and college friend, Deb seems to be pissed. Not his fault though...Night shifts take a toll; today being his thirteenth night shift.
"What happened?" I said
"You can talk sometimes...what's up with you? always hooked to the screen, writing!...there are other things to do you know"
I smiled...he was right. Sometimes we get so engrossed in something, we cease to realize that there are others to attend to or something that needs your attention to. Friendship is one such thing.
Anyway my story was going nowhere....and so I replied:
"Ok...Tell me"
Deb:"First...Do you have any food?I need it for the night"
Me:"Yeah...check the third shelf...It should be there"
The most exquisite and sumptuous viands...cakes,biscuits...you know...I usually have them at my disposal, in case I get hungry.
I don't like myself being kept waiting though. Like someone just pinged me and asked:"you there?" and then after a brief hello, the reply never comes back. Then why to call in the first place?
Similarly Deb stopped me in my work to tell me something...now it better be worth it!
Me: "Hey...now speak"
Deb:"Oh yes...that...Actually we were thinking of going to this awesome place for holidays. Will you join us?It would be fun"
Ardent socialism was never my thing...but sometimes it's nice to hang out with friends, to feel refreshed. Who knows;I may find a new angle to my story there!
Me:"Sure why not. But where are we going?"
Deb(excited): Gopalpur...
Me: "Do tell me the dates...I will then apply leaves accordingly. It's fine for you all I hope.
Deb: "Yeah...we don't care; we have off's. Losers like you take leave."
Nice way to compare a development with a production guy. In the end though we are all the IT guys.
Deb seemed hesitant for a moment. He wants to tell something but refrains from it.
Me: Hey, what happened? Speak up!
Deb: "Umm...It would be nice if Anayta comes with us"
Me: "I don't think so..."
Deb: "Hey...don't be rude to her...seriously don't you miss her?"
Me: "It's too late for that...you should have known that already"
But no matter how many times it broke my heart , I would still care for her...cause that is love...blind one indeed.
I kept mum...cause keeping silent is the only way I can hide my anguish.
Deb:"Hey...common man...you both are in the same city. Even your workplaces are nearby. Why don't you both sort things out"
Watching me being silent, he continues "I can help...you know...I am a friend to her too"
Me: "No thank you"
Deb: "See; I will be completely honest with you. She does miss you...she talks about you,like how..."
I interrupted him midway and said: "Tell her to say those to her fiancé."
Deb: "It broke up!"
Me: "So what huh? you want me to jump in? Seriously? All these...just...nonsense"
This shut him up...and I continued
"See Deb...I just want to have some peace. I want to be happy again...but not this"
Deb: "You write all this stories about love...don't you think we know to whom it points to? Good luck with that....I know you need her. Call her at least...I heard she was not doing well. But I will say no more....we are grown up enough to decide what we need."
A minute past ten , he left for his night shift...late by a minute and counting.
After he left I lay there on my bed pondering as to what he told me earlier. Mechanical Life...quite an embarrassment; forcing me to rethink of what I was becoming.
Wake up,brush,do breakfast, go to office,slog(sometimes...you have to),come back,do dinner and then sleep.Then do the same thing the next day.At least I don't have to do night shifts...that's comforting enough.
I wonder what has led to this predicament? Maybe I am to blame...
What about Anayta huh? She may not be feeling well but she is herself to blame. But but...she can call me instead if she misses me so much.
Though we are no longer together, but once we were. It's hard to forget what we were,what it meant to us. But why we had to separate? Perhaps I was not ready then...not ready to settle down so soon. Maybe she was helpless then...maybe I was being such a moron.
No matter how far the distance may be, how strewn the things are...if you ask for me,I'll come to you. I always will.
I closed my eyes in deep thought till I fell asleep.
Let there be light...let thy illuminate my space with warmth and love cause without it even the grandest of walls start to stink.
The phone rang briskly. The erring sound does make you curse the caller.
Meanwhile it was heavily raining outside and I left the window open. I realized that the rain in my dream was in fact the reality happening now except the moment was of past....the past I longed to forget.
Me: "So you like this one or that one?"
Anayta: " Ice creams! I love all of them"
Me: "Ok...here you have them."
After letting her's favorite ice-cream...I bent on my knees. Yes this is the time...whatever I had done before, I'll make amends today.
Anayta seemed confused. "Hey what happened?"
Me: "On a short note, I do have a proposition to you"
Anayta: "Hmm...do tell"
I hold her hand and took out the ring and said:"Will you be my valentine?"
Anayta: "Uh h..."
Well that was completely unexpected...I was a bit taken aback.
Me: "Aare...what? Did I do something wrong?"
Anayta: "No"
Me: "Then?"
Anayta: "You just write more"
Me: "And what does it have to do with that?"
Like really girls. Why can't you keep things simple? But then she replies...
Anayta: "Maybe If I like your next story, I will propose to you"(winking)
Me(smiling): "And what to do with this ring then?"
Anayta: "Oh boy you better put it in my finger"
I slid the ring in her finger.With a wide smile I took hold her and whispered to her ears: "The perfect story starts with you...and darling...I will never disappoint you"
This is inner feeling of anyone who has ever been in love. Correct me if I am wrong here. But you can't...I know.
Well...that was a long time ago. Day in and day out...my sole dedication is towards work. For it is the tool to stay away from all the worldly things...things that I am tired to do again...to feel again.
And then we met again...
*********************************************************************************
"Please let us know in case of any concerns"...it's everywhere...in every mail...damn sometimes I get irritated by this line.
"We have not received this file for today. Please send the same"...and then that awful line.
I mean what is the concern here?
"We follow a code here" Yes the code...I am also a part of it.
I checked the date...oh it's that time of the year again.
It's already late now and hence I signed off to proceed to home.
I am also a writer and I have a story to complete.But will it ever complete? I looked at myself and my story.Will I ever make it? There is always something missing from it.
It's already late now and hence I signed off to proceed to home.
I am also a writer and I have a story to complete.But will it ever complete? I looked at myself and my story.Will I ever make it? There is always something missing from it.
Then all of a sudden-
"What the hell are you doing everyday? Mechanical life!"
My room-mate and college friend, Deb seems to be pissed. Not his fault though...Night shifts take a toll; today being his thirteenth night shift.
"What happened?" I said
"You can talk sometimes...what's up with you? always hooked to the screen, writing!...there are other things to do you know"
I smiled...he was right. Sometimes we get so engrossed in something, we cease to realize that there are others to attend to or something that needs your attention to. Friendship is one such thing.
Anyway my story was going nowhere....and so I replied:
"Ok...Tell me"
Deb:"First...Do you have any food?I need it for the night"
Me:"Yeah...check the third shelf...It should be there"
The most exquisite and sumptuous viands...cakes,biscuits...you know...I usually have them at my disposal, in case I get hungry.
I don't like myself being kept waiting though. Like someone just pinged me and asked:"you there?" and then after a brief hello, the reply never comes back. Then why to call in the first place?
Similarly Deb stopped me in my work to tell me something...now it better be worth it!
Me: "Hey...now speak"
Deb:"Oh yes...that...Actually we were thinking of going to this awesome place for holidays. Will you join us?It would be fun"
Ardent socialism was never my thing...but sometimes it's nice to hang out with friends, to feel refreshed. Who knows;I may find a new angle to my story there!
Me:"Sure why not. But where are we going?"
Deb(excited): Gopalpur...
Me: "Do tell me the dates...I will then apply leaves accordingly. It's fine for you all I hope.
Deb: "Yeah...we don't care; we have off's. Losers like you take leave."
Nice way to compare a development with a production guy. In the end though we are all the IT guys.
Deb seemed hesitant for a moment. He wants to tell something but refrains from it.
Me: Hey, what happened? Speak up!
Deb: "Umm...It would be nice if Anayta comes with us"
Me: "I don't think so..."
Deb: "Hey...don't be rude to her...seriously don't you miss her?"
Me: "It's too late for that...you should have known that already"
But no matter how many times it broke my heart , I would still care for her...cause that is love...blind one indeed.
I kept mum...cause keeping silent is the only way I can hide my anguish.
Deb:"Hey...common man...you both are in the same city. Even your workplaces are nearby. Why don't you both sort things out"
Watching me being silent, he continues "I can help...you know...I am a friend to her too"
Me: "No thank you"
Deb: "See; I will be completely honest with you. She does miss you...she talks about you,like how..."
I interrupted him midway and said: "Tell her to say those to her fiancé."
Deb: "It broke up!"
Me: "So what huh? you want me to jump in? Seriously? All these...just...nonsense"
This shut him up...and I continued
"See Deb...I just want to have some peace. I want to be happy again...but not this"
Deb: "You write all this stories about love...don't you think we know to whom it points to? Good luck with that....I know you need her. Call her at least...I heard she was not doing well. But I will say no more....we are grown up enough to decide what we need."
A minute past ten , he left for his night shift...late by a minute and counting.
After he left I lay there on my bed pondering as to what he told me earlier. Mechanical Life...quite an embarrassment; forcing me to rethink of what I was becoming.
Wake up,brush,do breakfast, go to office,slog(sometimes...you have to),come back,do dinner and then sleep.Then do the same thing the next day.At least I don't have to do night shifts...that's comforting enough.
I wonder what has led to this predicament? Maybe I am to blame...
What about Anayta huh? She may not be feeling well but she is herself to blame. But but...she can call me instead if she misses me so much.
Though we are no longer together, but once we were. It's hard to forget what we were,what it meant to us. But why we had to separate? Perhaps I was not ready then...not ready to settle down so soon. Maybe she was helpless then...maybe I was being such a moron.
No matter how far the distance may be, how strewn the things are...if you ask for me,I'll come to you. I always will.
I closed my eyes in deep thought till I fell asleep.
Let there be light...let thy illuminate my space with warmth and love cause without it even the grandest of walls start to stink.
You told me you wanted to end it....to end what we had;
I closed my eyes to hold my tears and tried to breathe in the air between the teeth.
Cloud bursting...wind hissing, I could feel the water rushing and the wind hitting my face like water being poured over ash.
The phone rang briskly. The erring sound does make you curse the caller.
Meanwhile it was heavily raining outside and I left the window open. I realized that the rain in my dream was in fact the reality happening now except the moment was of past....the past I longed to forget.
Damn...what is the time?
The clock just struck 3...in the morning!
"uh...hello?"
Deb:"Dude get up and come to the hospital...Apollo hospital."
Me:"Huh...Hey what happened?"
Deb:"I just received a call from them...seems like there has been an accident"
Me:"Uh h...okay okay...bring your car then. Night's rough,what happened man?"
Deb:"Just get ready...fast"
Me:"Hey...jeez...I am getting up...what's up to the tone?"
Deb: "Just be ready ok...don't be a jerk...Anayta's condition seems serious...I am coming to pick you up."
Me:"Oh...okay"
Clouds bursting...so are my emotions. The real passionate...there has been one and only one and I would let no harm on you...ever.
I looked through the glass...She was lying there and looking straight to me. I could sense a tear falling from her eyes.I am still very weak at it.
I spoke to the doctor who just came outside.
The clock just struck 3...in the morning!
"uh...hello?"
Deb:"Dude get up and come to the hospital...Apollo hospital."
Me:"Huh...Hey what happened?"
Deb:"I just received a call from them...seems like there has been an accident"
Me:"Uh h...okay okay...bring your car then. Night's rough,what happened man?"
Deb:"Just get ready...fast"
Me:"Hey...jeez...I am getting up...what's up to the tone?"
Deb: "Just be ready ok...don't be a jerk...Anayta's condition seems serious...I am coming to pick you up."
Me:"Oh...okay"
Clouds bursting...so are my emotions. The real passionate...there has been one and only one and I would let no harm on you...ever.
*********************************************************************************
I spoke to the doctor who just came outside.
Me:"What happened to her Doctor?"
Doctor:"Are you close to her?"
Me:"Um...yes"
Doctor:"Are you close to her?"
Me:"Um...yes"
Doctor: "Well then...it's good...you see her pressure dropped seriously low...her landlord found her in the stairs lying unconscious"
I pitied her. Among the words of the doctor I looked at her again,her gaze still fixed at mine.
Doctor: "She needs someone really close to her...are you a relative of her? She was looking at you from quite some time."
Me: "U mm...no...um mm...yes...I...uhh ,can I see her for a moment?"
Doctor: "You can...but keep it simple...she just went through a shock.This type of blood pressure is not good...another shock like this will be fatal for her"
Me: "Yes...sure."
I took permission and went inside, meanwhile Deb went to the reception to fill some documents.
"Hey!"
I took hold of her soft hands....with her wet eyes she smiled.
Anayta: "You came to see me..." (her voice shrieking)
Me: "Where else I would have been"(smiling)
The tears went berserk for her now...she did miss me dearly. I can see it in her eyes.
Anayta: "You were always there for me...I am sorry for all the pain I caused."
Me: "Hey hey...shhh....don't worry...now I am here, everything will be fine. Let me take care of you now."
I kissed her forehead and took her in my arms as Deb came inside.
Deb: "See, you two look good with each other."
We all laughed together...perhaps the longest since a long time.
I took permission and went inside, meanwhile Deb went to the reception to fill some documents.
"Hey!"
I took hold of her soft hands....with her wet eyes she smiled.
Anayta: "You came to see me..." (her voice shrieking)
Me: "Where else I would have been"(smiling)
The tears went berserk for her now...she did miss me dearly. I can see it in her eyes.
Anayta: "You were always there for me...I am sorry for all the pain I caused."
Me: "Hey hey...shhh....don't worry...now I am here, everything will be fine. Let me take care of you now."
I kissed her forehead and took her in my arms as Deb came inside.
Deb: "See, you two look good with each other."
We all laughed together...perhaps the longest since a long time.
*********************************************************************************
Months passed...yes, the day of the year came again. But this time the circumstances are quite different.
Me: "So you like this one or that one?"
Anayta: " Ice creams! I love all of them"
Me: "Ok...here you have them."
After letting her's favorite ice-cream...I bent on my knees. Yes this is the time...whatever I had done before, I'll make amends today.
Anayta seemed confused. "Hey what happened?"
Me: "On a short note, I do have a proposition to you"
Anayta: "Hmm...do tell"
I hold her hand and took out the ring and said:"Will you be my valentine?"
Anayta: "Uh h..."
Well that was completely unexpected...I was a bit taken aback.
Me: "Aare...what? Did I do something wrong?"
Anayta: "No"
Me: "Then?"
Anayta: "You just write more"
Me: "And what does it have to do with that?"
Like really girls. Why can't you keep things simple? But then she replies...
Anayta: "Maybe If I like your next story, I will propose to you"(winking)
Me(smiling): "And what to do with this ring then?"
Anayta: "Oh boy you better put it in my finger"
I slid the ring in her finger.With a wide smile I took hold her and whispered to her ears: "The perfect story starts with you...and darling...I will never disappoint you"
*********************************************************************************
Did I?
